Saintes and Bayonne

For some reason, I did not post this after I wrote it last year. I have no clue what happened. Anyways, Clog America is off in Europe currently and all the pictures make me miss dancing with them; I especially miss the festival experience. I'm definitely looking forward to dancing in the Springville World Folk Festival in Utah to get a little of my festival fix.  In the meantime, here is what went on last year at one of the most... interesting.... festivals I have been at! 


Travel back in time to 2011 and hope the ocean over to France......


Well, I hope someone is enjoying these pictures, because here come more! After Paris, we drove down to Saintes, in the Bordeaux region, for our first festival. 

Jam session with Venezuela, Canary Islands, and Mexico

Amanda and I with Eva, from Venezuela. She was very friendly!

Amanda and I with Eva and the group from India. They had a guy doing some nifty magic tricks, which was fun! This first day at the festival was really great for visiting with the other countries. 

With my friends from Venezuela.

So we had a lot of down time at this festival... a lot! This day, rather than wander through the city, Amy and I decided to stay at the school where we ate lunch and just talk and read and nap. This was my view from the ground... quite lovely!

This is Amy and I resting. We had a really great conversation that afternoon, which was so awesome. That was one of the great things about this tour: really having time to get to know people and have more of those deeper conversations.

Jen G.'s awesome friend Amy came on tour for the first little while. She rocks! The three of us were roommates in Saintes and we had a fun time, especially with our self-made booby traps (aka laundry lines). Amy also rocked the bag-watching duty. After our show this night we paraded and she stayed behind to watch our stuff... and ended up having to rescue it twice from the sprinklers! Talk about dedication. 

Jenny and I with a friend from India. They performed some very fun dancing, more towards the Bhangra style, I think. Either way, they did a great job. I wish I could have seen more!

My fun friend from the Canary Islands!  We got to talk a lot in Spanish. He invited me to visit him in the Canary Islands, told me about his house on the beach there, his family, and we even talked a little bit of religion! Chrissy served a Spanish-speaking mission and had talked to him about the Church, and we continued some of that conversation as well. Mom, the minute he invited me to visit and stay with his family, I thought of you and I taking a vacation... :)

Venezuela! Some of these South American dancers have some far-out costumes and dances. In spite of the show-girl-esque costumes, this dance was fairly tame. 

I'm so bad, but I don't remember where this dancer is from. I want to say Taiwan, and I'm pretty sure that is correct.  I should whip out my journal and make sure, but I'm tired and lazy right now. Either way, she is beautiful!

Sometimes the food we got was pretty good. Sometimes we got a lot of mystery meat. This lunch was particularly unappetizing, though. Rice with corn, tomatoes, hard boiled eggs, and tuna. I didn't eat much. Food was on our agenda for the afternoon outing. 

We listened to our amazing band rehearse for a little while in the afternoon. Seriously, they know how to jam! They are all super skilled individually, and collectively they make great music. 

Our fabulous show at some chateau with one porta potty for the entire event, rationed food (see below) and stinging nettle in the changing areas.... which come to think of it, the changing areas weren't close enough to the stage so we were in the "woods" behind the stage... with the stinging nettle. And a steep ramp to get on stage. No stairs, just a ramp. Great in slippery clogs. Or character shoes. 

Before we got kicked off the "eating" tables. We didn't know, we just wanted some place to get ready!

Fries, cantaloupe, fried chicken and apple tart: the dinner of champions. One piece of chicken each please, and no more! And no more fries! (It was a strict kitchen.)

Think happy thoughts

I've been thinking a lot lately. The house is relatively quiet without my mom here to keep me busy with errands and cooking projects... and sure, I can do those on my own, but then I'll eat all that yummy goodness! And we don't need groceries, which takes out the need to shop.  Anyways, the free time flows slowly, I guess.  I've been seeing pictures of friends weddings and engagements... 'tis the season, to be sure! I've been thinking a lot about moving back to Utah and trying to find a job. Trying not to think about getting into the dating world. Sadly, I know I can't avoid it either - that solves no problems. Thinking about why I stayed  in that relationship for so long. Wondering if I should share that with people. Thinking about other trials I've worked through in the past six months. Wondering if I should share that with people. Thinking about how I miss academia and have lost some self-direction since not being a student anymore. Thinking about how I'm really missing Clog America right now, too. 

Admiring the intellectuality of friends I have who make excellent, insightful connections that make me feel smart just for reading what they've said. Admiring the spirituality and depth of friends who always lift me up personally and live their lives in Christlike ways.  Looking forward to living with friends who relish every opportunity in life: creating, sharing, loving, existing with so much joy and clarity. Wondering what I offer... am I helping others by how I live my life? I won't say I'm not.... but I might could do better. Sometimes I get filled with ideas, like creating a blog to document my impending dating discoveries, or creating another blog to share intellectual tidbits about art, humanities, philosophy, etc. 

Or, what about really getting that dance company set up? Once a week mandatory rehearsal for group numbers, forum to connect and develop solos/duets/small group pieces, any dance style accepted. Provo/Orem is a land of dance studios. Wouldn't it be easy to reserve rehearsal space somewhere? At a reasonable price so that members can participate with low monetary and time requirements? I guess it gets tricky finding performance venues, but a little ingenuity would solve that problem too. And money. Hmm. 

And I think of patterns. Circularity. Pitfalls. And I think I ought to say something about it to people, like here. But then I think, hey, I'm probably a little negative already, perhaps too personal already, and what will be accomplished by sharing? I haven't decided. It makes me think of spirals. The spiral is an ancient symbol. It suggests eternity, though I often find it relates well to my conception of life as I strive to draw closer to Christ. A finite spiral does have end points. You start at one and progress in circles to the other end. Life is so very circular!! It has to be. We gain knowledge, we act on that knowledge, and a consequence follows. Good consequences encourage us to repeat the acts that caused them, and sad consequences move us to repeat the process and use different actions or different knowledge. Ideally, our circular journey moves us upward and closer to our destination: living like Christ did. And ultimately, living with Him. 

Check out the spirals 

Budhha's got it going on

Ancient Celts had it figured out in the B.C's 

Nautilus by Edward Weston.
Spirals in nature: proof that's not man-made

Well, I suppose it's time to get to the real reason for the post. I saw a link to this great article on a friend's Facebook wall, and I thought it would be an excellent share! 

12 Happy Thoughts for Troubled Times By Marc

People and circumstances will occasionally break you down.  But if you keep your mind focused, your heart open to possibility, and continue to put one foot in front of the other, you will be able to quickly recover the pieces, rebuild, and come back much stronger than you ever would have been otherwise.

Here are a few happy thoughts to ponder on those days when the whole world seems like it’s crashing down around you.

1. Down days are completely normal, and not something you should feel guilty about having.  Happiness is never constant.  Surrendering to your sadness, or whatever negative emotion is trying to come to the surface, does not make you a bad person.  But remember, if you aren’t sincerely thankful for every smile, don’t be totally shocked by every tear.  Keep things in perspective.  Read Happiness Is a Serious Problem.
2. When you are at your lowest point, you are open to the greatest positive change.  Happiness is not the absence of problems, but the strength to deal with them.  Strength doesn’t come from what you can do; it comes from overcoming the things you once thought you couldn’t do.
3. There is a huge difference between giving up and moving on.  Moving on doesn’t mean giving up, but rather accepting that there aresome things that cannot be.  Moving on can mean that you’re making achoice to be happy rather than hurt.  For some folks, good situations last a lifetime, but for many, not knowing when to move on can hold them back forever.
4. Life rarely turns out exactly the way you want it to, but you still have an opportunity to make it great.  You have to do what you can, with what you have, exactly where you are.  It won’t always be easy, but it will be worth it in the end.  Remember that there is no perfect life, just perfect moments.  And it’s these moments you must cherish; it’s these moments that make the whole journey worthwhile.
5. Most people ask for happiness on condition, but long-term happiness can only be felt if you don’t set conditions.  Accept life unconditionally. Realize that life balances itself between the ideal and the disappointing.  And the disappointments are just life’s way of saying, “I’ve got something better for you right around the corner.”  So be patient, live life, accept what is, and have a little faith.
6. Too often, we carry around things from our past that hurt us – regrets, shame, anger, pain, etc.  Don’t let these negative points from the past rob your present happiness.  You had to live though these things in the past, and although unfortunate, they can’t be changed.  But if the only place they live today is in your mind, then let go, move on, and be happy. Read Change Your Thoughts - Change Your Life.
7. You can choose to view things differently.  Pick one part of your life that you are unhappy with and look at it from a different point of view.  See the rain as nourishment for future growth.  Consider being alone for awhile to create the solitude you need to hear your inner voice.  Think of your lack of funds as an opportunity to experience the simple things in life.  Right now, you can choose to allow the light to shine in your life.  It is a choice.  Why not allow it?
8. Once you embrace unpleasant news, not as a negative but as evidence of a need for positive change, you’re learning from it and growing.  Whatever life throws at you, even if it hurts, be strong and fight through it.  Remember, strong walls shake but never collapse.  Life always offers you another chance – it’s called tomorrow.
9. When your flaws are stitched together with good intentions, your flaws make you beautiful.  It’s better to be true to yourself and risk being ridiculed by others, than to be false, and miss out on the beauty of being YOU.  Never be bullied into silence.  Never let someone else tell you who you are.  Accept no one’s definition of your life, except your own.
10. You have the ability to heal yourself.  Just like lava flowing slowly out of a volcano, you must create a healthy outlet for your pain and anger.  It’s important after you’ve been hurt to take some time to think about your pain, and address it calmly and consciously, so you can thwart the possibility of more pain brewing from your own negativity.
11. There’s a lot of life left to be lived.  The real tragedy in life is not death, but the passion we let die inside of us while we still live.  Remember, troubles from the past cannot define you, destroy you, or defeat you all by themselves.  As long as you keep pushing forward, they can only strengthen you.  Read You Can Heal Your Life.
12. You are a work in progress; which means you get there a little at a time, not all at once.  Today is a brand new day – a fresh start.  Replace negativity with positivity.  Think happy thoughts.  Exercise.  Drink lots of water.  Fill your body with fuel.  Healthy is happy.  Inspire yourself.  Create.  Laugh.  Play.  Love.  Learn.  Give someone a compliment.  Perform a random act of kindness.  Take a chance on an idea you believe in.  You have the opportunity to do these things every single day – to make the necessary changes and slowly become the person you want to be.  You just have to decide to do it.  Decide that today is the day.  Say it: “This is going to be my day!”

Summer Happenings

We begin at the beginning of my time at home.... sleeping in late, eating breakfast late, and staying around to help with kitchen adventures. (For concerned people, I am now back to getting dressed before noon. No worries.) 

Peach Jam! These little cups are the ones I made. 

Don't they look precious? Sadly, they also look a little runny. Therefore the parable of the peach jam. Thou shalt not be too impatient. My mom and I were worried that the jam wasn't setting right and so we tried to quick-fix it by adding more pectin. However, the one we left sitting out in a bowl of extra eventually turned into the right consistency. I directly related this to my failures in dating. Apparently I'm like peach jam: very difficult to get all the conditions just perfect for it to turn out right. But with a little extra time, it will all turn out right in the end. Amen. 

Peaches from our tree.... the pretty sides of them. :) 

Adding pectin to the second batch of jam. This was my mom's which, of course, turned out perfectly. I just have to say that my peaches had been sugared prior to jamming, which threw off the exact calculations needed. More parable! I'm just too sweet for my own good. ??.... maybe not? 

The mess of my peach jam getting reheated and reconstituted to make it jell together. Lovely process. Like getting over a broken engagement. 

Lovely, huh? 

So instead of being bested by the elusive peach jam success, I tried another project! I've decided I need more hobbies. And I like being productive anyways. So I combined all that with my love of crafts and colors and joined my mom in the ranks of quilt making! 

This is my lovely self cutting strips for my awesome new quilt. 

It's a very precise process. And I'm happy to say my cutting skills were up to par!

All the pretty colors for my quilt. I love bright colors!

Doesn't that pile just make you so happy?

Designing the quilt. This process taught me I'm much more orderly and less random than I thought. And it takes a lot of little strips to get things to the right length. We had to go back and add another section for more length. But designing sure was fun! I may keep that up and design quilts for my mom's new business, Pink Daisy Quilts. 

Time to sew! It's way better on this wonderful new machine than the old one I used before. And it has some little things to help me make a straight line! I must also brag that I made some very excellent corners in the process... not an easy thing for a beginner quilter. 

Are you ready for the final result?? Well good, because this is only the partly final result! I don't think I have a picture of it with the borders on, actually, but this is the main quilt top all pieced together. It took many hours and some un-picking and re-sewing, but I love how it all turned out for the stripes!

Testing out border colors. We decided to put on this nice orange instead of the crazy pink/yellow/orange one we originally chose. 

What I love to do at home: 

Tan by the pool. 

Read.

Read while tanning by the pool!

Caught by the paparzzi!

Posing for the picture. Yes, I am and always will be a picture ham. 

Horizontal stripes.... slimming or not?? 

Sneak peak of another project I worked on... but it's top secret! Sh... don't tell. 

Now, my mom claims that I suggested we paint this shelf. And I thought that she was the one who wanted to paint it. Neither one of us really remembers. Regardless, we now have an ocean breeze blue bookshelf gracing the walls of our basement! It's the first piece I've helped spray paint to repurpose (something I've wanted to try for a while), and it is also the first piece of "office" furniture for my mom's new business, Pink Daisy Quilts! See the pink daisy on top? Yeah, that's intentional. Filling it up is still a work in progress. 

And finally, here are the pillow shams for my new quilt, which shows an abbreviated version of the quilt with stripes, borders, and the channel quilting. Can't wait to see the final product!! 

And that's what I've done so far since being home. Along with other small projects here and there like cinnamon rolls, and movies, and watering flowers, and walking at 6 am most mornings, and shopping..... oh yes. The shopping! Also, can't forget the relatively massive progress made on my cross-stitching project!! 

I also want it to be known that I did, in fact, attend YSA at least once. I even stayed and played a game after the event ended. Duty fulfilled. And I've applied for several jobs in Utah County. 

One month later

Well, it's been one month since my life dramatically changed course. Wow. I made it! I made it? Yeah.... I think so at least. I'm still here, still pushing forward, at whatever pace that may be.

... breathe....           ........... breathe.......

Some of you know the story.... most of you don't. As Rafiki says in The Lion King, "It doesn't matter now; it's in the past." My emotions are starting to catch up to my brain now with remembering this. Unwanted people (person) doesn't show up in my dreams anymore. Even though many things around me bring up connections to said individual, they're not emotionally charged anymore. I'm working to cut those links even more. For example, tonight we had Cincinnati Chili for dinner. Yummo!! I love this dish, but I hadn't made it in a long time. As I started telling my mom the reason why I hadn't made it, I paused. The reason had to do with person, but the reason doesn't really matter. I just haven't made that dish in a while. End of story. That's what I'm working on now.

I have also decided to move back to Provo. On some levels, I'm scared. I still have a hard time sometimes getting on Facebook and seeing the signs of relationship bliss. Don't get me wrong: I'm so happy for my friends! My personal relationship failures haven't made me so jaded that I can't appreciate the joy that my friends feel in their successes. It's beautiful to see their engagements, their babies, their fun activities. I need their good examples, really. I settled for what quickly became a sham of a relationship, a joke of an engagement.

Wait a sec.... I'm getting off track. So, I'm moving back to Provo. I don't have a job. I don't have anywhere to live, as of yet. I won't say I'm ready to leave Missouri, nor do I think I'll be jumping at the bit to get back to Utah, but..... it feels like the best thing to do. I have many great friends there who have proven to be a strong support system for me. When I start getting worried I think about them. At baptism we covenant to "bear one another's burdens" and sometimes I feel like I  might be that burden to people. I hope not... I hope I can be strong enough with the Lord to just be normal. But if not, He's blessed me with friends that have already shown their love and care.

Well, I'm waxing long-winded. I just wanted to mark that it's been a month. And I'm doing quite well, compared to many others who experienced something like this. And I've figured out my next steps. Now to pray that I get a good job that will help support my decision!

The last six months

Well, obviously a lot has happened in the last six months. And to be completely honest, I didn't take very many pictures during that time to begin with. Once you figure in all the ones I deleted as of late, well... it's a pretty sparse selection. Here are some favorites!

Mark was nice enough to let me take him on a date to hike the Y. 

Classic Mark pose. 

ROAD TRIP TO VEGAS!!!

Hideous yet funny bedspreads at Motel 6. 

An ashtray that says "No Smoking".... where's the logic in that one?

Best place ever!!

Aww, cutesy wootsy. And I was there, too. 

That awesome John Cusack movie "Serendipity"? We had dinner at that restaurant! 

So much ice cream sundae!!!

Splashed by the dolphins at the Mirage.

Now you may be wondering why there are four trainers at the dolphin pool. They could just be bored. Or, they could be working to keep the dolphins calm after a rather large guest managed to fall over the retaining wall and into the tank! And considering the standing ledge on the pool side of the low wall, it's kind of miraculous that she managed to actually fall in the water. 

Cute dolphins. I've decided I want to swim with dolphins before I die. 

They did some fun tricks for us when the trainers fed them. 

Hello!

The friendly dolphin who showed off but didn't splash us. We're besties. 

Dolphins not cool enough? Big cats (not pictured on my blog I guess) not cool enough? How about a nightly volcano eruption! We were pretty far away but you could still feel the heat surge with the flames. 

Contemplative mustachio me. 

Awesome seats at the bar at the Rainforest Cafe, MGM. 

Mandalay Bay. This is where I would go if I wanted to stay in Vegas. 

And that's all she wrote for now! I had to get these up so I could share my quilting and peaching adventures.