Ring in the new

It's awfully quiet. The hall light lends a little warmth to the apartment, while the stove light sets something of a mood. The fridge kicks off. Wow, it's even quieter than before. This isn't where I want to be. And the sad part is I don't know where I DO want to be. Just not here. I don't really care about what's happening on this episode of NCIS. I'm tired of checking my watch to see if I can justify just going to bed and skipping the "festivities." For someone who knows a lot of people, it seems like I don't. I'm not sure what it is about me, but I don't think I really stick. People remember people that talk loud or walk loud or dress loud or act loud. I talk not so much or so loud, I don't strive to be the center of attention, and in being the nice person who talks to everyone, it sometimes feel like I'm not talking to anyone at all. Am I homesick? Do I just lack the courage to walk 50 yards and peek in at a party? There's probably enough people there I won't even be noticed. I'll go in just a minute. I've been saying that since 8:30. I'm sure time will pass quickly once I get there. Arrive in time to mingle a little, not so early that I run out of people to talk to, countdown, go home. Empty apartments. I got used to it over the summer. It was pretty nice, too. But getting used to it didn't mean I had a life. And as much of a social life I had last year, I haven't seemed to do much this year in improving it. I know, most of my friends are still at home for the holidays. I usually would be. Even that was not as fun last year. No fun to be stuck behind when all your friends have moved on to "real" life. By the way, this couch is ridiculously static-y. I feel like a 3 year old towhead whose hair is sticking straight up. Or out. I'm mustering my courage. I've got a bottle of bubbly... that could help. (Don't worry, it's non-alcoholic of course). A Christmas gift from work. It's just that I haven't had anyone to share it with since I got it. And alcohol or no, you should never drink alone. Ireland showed me that-- it's a social thing. Doesn't matter if it's water, juice, or icky-smelling beer, it's a social thing. So I really can't open my bubbly yet. I think if I sit here typing long enough I'll get sick of my own company and leave just to get away from myself. Which, true, is what I need to do. And right now I feel a little more like I want to. Gotta fix the face. And the hair. I put my cute shirt on today just so I could wear it to this party tonight and look good. It's a great color and it's got a slenderizing effect. Can't beat that. My hair even turned out good this morning! I should go brush up. Must fix my eyes. 90 minutes. I think I can handle 90 minutes of a party. Well, plus the post-midnight events. I wonder if the band is still playing? Ok, I'm going to stop and go get ready. I am more than ready to welcome in a new year, and hopefully some new possibilities. 2008 was great: I graduated, got a real job, made an internationally performing dance team, and made some friends along the way. But divide that by 12 months and it seems a little short. This year I'll shoot for five cool things to remember.

Just noticed my quote of the day. It'll be gone later, so here it is. That's what I'm gonna go do.

If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else.

Booker T. Washington (1856-1915)