Self Esteem Spectrum

Within six hours this evening, I had two very different messages conveyed to me regarding myself. That sounds weird, but it's late and I'm tired and just want to put the stories somewhere before I forget them. 


1. Near the end of my girls' dance recital tonight, all the teachers were brought on stage and given flowers. Lynne named the teachers and what they taught. Until she got to me. Then she looked at me and realized she didn't know me and (microphone in hand and audience listening) asked me my name and then told everyone that she'd only seen me once. Thanks, Lynne. I've been to at least two meetings at your house before and introduced myself there. And she saw me during the show, right before my girls went on stage. And asked me then who I was. Yup. I'm glad I was wearing a cute outfit. I kept the flowers. And I think that moment helped solidify my decision to not return to teach next year. 


2. So, in order to rebalance the "blow" to my self esteem, see what happened at the rodeo. I went with Collin, Jimmy Chung, and Betsy to the Strawberry Days Rodeo in Pleasant Grove. So fun!! That's a good group to go with, for sure. Anyways, there were some people in front of us who wanted to get a group picture once the rodeo ended. They asked Collin to take it, then gathered their friends around. So I'm standing there, just kind of waiting for the picture to be finished. And this guy pops up, looks at me, and seems suddenly disoriented. He asks me my name, says his name is Landon, and shakes my hand. Still giving me a funny look. I ask if I know him. He says no... then sort of wanders over to join the picture. I'm like, ok. That was interesting. Picture ends... and he comes back and introduces himself again and shakes my hand again. Then he asks Collin if we're together.... to his credit Collin kind of fudged and said yes, we'd come as a group from the same ward. Singles ward. So the guy got the answer he wanted.. that Collin and I weren't a thing and that I was single. Thankfully, we were exiting the arena. I could see him watching me the whole time I walked out, but thankfully I didn't have to make much eye contact as we passed (thanks for jumping the fence, Jimmy!). It was a little weird and a little flattering. I seriously stopped him in his tracks, I think. And I'm 99% positive he would have asked for my number, had he gotten the chance. 


And there you have it. Two very different experiences on the self esteem spectrum tonight. I'll probably post more about dance once I get the pictures up here... and it's so late and I'm tired.